The Beast

I'd like you all to meet my newest play pal, The Beast.

We met at the kinky community I keep talking about (www.darkside.se), he found me, we started a conversation, you know; the usual stuff. After a while we decided that what we had felt good enough that a date would be suitable. Said and done, friday evening was spent together drinking tea and watching a movie (Avatar, go see, beautiful) and we found out that indeed we do make a good match.

Yesterday we spent in a little cottage out in the woods, all alone and no one to hear me scream...

We really hit it off, there were no hesitation or fumbling, spot on and full speed ahead at once.  Unless he had told me so I would never have guessed him to be a beginner-dom. His imagination is vivid and evil, he got the craftmanship to follow through on every nasty idea he gets and I'm the one he's doing it too. I feel blessed!

His nick-name is based on the fact that he's like a beast in bed, I merely have to grab onto his body (his oh so muscular body) and try to keep up. He also likes to bite me. My neck is red, scratched and complete with a hickey, and so is my breasts. Hence The Beast and the wolf picture.

This is a guy that will stay with me for a while so forget those others I've tried out lately, they pale in comparison. Remember, The Beast.

Merry Christmas!

Porrtrollet makes another notch in her bed post...

I'd just like note that I've met a boy, full of life and naughty toughts, that fit me exactly. We've just spent two glorious days together and I'm sure more will come as I finally seem to have a permanent play partner more close to my home.

For now I wish you all a very merry christmas with lots of spanking, presents and time to rejoice with the ones close to you. Mwah!

I'm so just back home after a date with a super sweet guy and I can't wait to meet him again! But untill I've talked to him about the blog I won't share details. Just, Im thrilled!

Share - The strap-less strap-on

This is an amazing toy.

First of all it's a lot of fun to suddenly have a cock to fool around with. For once you can be the one standing up taking your partner from behind or lying down and watching your partner struggle as they try to ride your cock. Much fun.

Secondly, Share feels awesome, for both parts. Notice the strange design and the lack of straps? The short bulky part goes into the pussy and with use of your pussy muscles you can walk around wagging your own cock in a matter of seconds. Just remember to not use alot of lubrication when inserting it as that will make it slide out again. However, if you know your pussy muscles are weak this might not be the thing for you as it's quit heavy and you have to hold it up by internal muscles alone. Judging by the respons from the man I tried this on the cock part feels like heaven on a stick. Not to mention seeing your "dick" going inside someone else, that is a fascinating image! It does take some practising to get used to the in-and-out-movement but surely you don't mind practising with your partner, may it be male or female?

Share is made out of silicon and has the lovely silk smooth touch that almost all of Fun Factorys products has and that I love. It is a bit on the expensive side but totally worth it. I strongly recommend this to anyone bold enough to go where no one gone before!

I discovered, as I was browsing through Chagrin, that I find a man giving a blow job to a strap on to be very attractive. It actually awoke my dominant side and next time I get my hands on a submissive man I'll be doing this in plenty! It just baffles me that I didn't do this last year when I had both a submissive partner and the amazing Share

Bi-dream

In front of me stood a woman, naked and voluptuous. As I walked closer I noticed that I too was naked and that our bodies looked similar. I knew I knew the woman in front of me but I couldn't name her, only knew that this was right, this was supposed to happen.
As I got closer she lifted her arms and invited me to her body and I gently embraced her into my arms. As we hugged I could feel every curve or her body, her ample breasts and soft stomach pushing against mine, and it was a warm and fuzzy feeling. Suddenly we were stood in a corner and I was leaning against the wall and we were kissing. It was a long and deep kiss, her tongue played around inside my mouth, feeling every little detail, rubbing against my tongue and following my lips lines. It was a sensual kiss and I woke up longing for a woman.

Orgasms

I have never in my life faked an orgasm and the times I've had sex and not had one can be counted on one hand throughout my entire life. I can make myself come very easily but I got a little hangup when someone tries to do it for me. Even though my summer crush made me think I died and went to heaven when he put his tongue on my pussy he never made me come. It strikes me as rather odd and I'm getting a bit frustrated by this. And sometimes I hear of girls only being able to come when someone else does it for them, I have no idea how they manage that?

And how do I get rid of a sexual hangup?

Caged, part 2

Better late than never ey?
Part two of the lovely novel by the lovely Mita from DarkSide.
Part one can be found here.


Once again, I woke up in darkness, curled in a little ball in my cage. This time, it was from my bladder reminding me of certain basic needs. I shifted restlessly, trying to find the most comfortable position, but froze as I heard footsteps coming my way, marching in time with the clinking of dangling keys. The footsteps stopped just outside my cage and the cover was flung off (someone must have checked up on me as I slept and put it back on). 
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I blinked in the sharp, sudden light. This was not the same man as before. This one had a handsome, clean-shaven face with piercing blue eyes, short blond hair and a tall, muscular body. He was dressed all in black and held a leash in one hand while he bent to unlock and open the door of my cage.

“Come here. Now, you do not want me to have to come in and get you!” he said with a low but commanding voice as I hesitated, pressed against the bars across the cage from him, trying to hide my nakedness. I finally obeyed, but apparently I wasn’t moving quickly enough for his liking, for as soon as I was close enough he reached in with his right hand, grabbed a hold of my hair, and pulled to make me move faster. As I exited the cage and was on the floor just in front of him, he held his grip on my hair, and pulled my upper body up and back. At the same time he gave my behind a lash with the end of the leash and said “Sit” in a prompt tone. I sat down on my heels, and before he let go of my hair he tilted my head downwards. He clipped the leash in place, and then turned so that I was kneeling close to his left side.

“Now, this is called “Heel”, and is what you’re expected to do when exiting out of your cage, of course always waiting for the order before moving” he told me, and with a quick tug on the leash and a curt “Come,” he started forward, me crawling on all fours next to him. He kept the leash very short, and I was forced to lengthen my neck as much as I could, and keep close to his leg, in order not to chokingly be dragged along. 

We went to a door I hadn’t noticed before, set in the opposite wall. Behind it was a bathroom complete with shower stall, sink and a toilet. He stopped a couple of steps into the bathroom, pulling me to a sitting position with the leash. He then unclipped it and pointed to the toilet. 

“Help yourself to the toilet.” He made no move of leaving the room, and when I hesitated he poked my butt with the tip of his boot. “Your days of privacy are over. You might as well get used to that right now. Get moving!” Mortified and flushing furiously, I went to the toilet and did what I had to do, whilst looking down on the floor; trying to pretend that he wasn’t in the room, watching me. 

When I had finished he ordered me into the shower, hands on the wall in front of me. I heard him bustling about, but didn’t dare to take a peak. I jumped when warm water suddenly hit me in a soft shower. He made sure I was thoroughly wet before turning the water off, pouring some shampoo on my hair and starting to massage it in. After having kneaded my head and neck, he poured a fresh-smelling soap on a puff and kept soaping my arms, back and legs. I had started to relax a bit from the warm water and the luxury of being gently and thoroughly washed, letting my head hang forward with my eyes closed, and didn’t react when he started soaping my belly, until he suddenly dropped the puff to the floor and let both his hands slide up to my breasts to give them a firm squeeze. 

My head came up with a snap, and instinctively I tore my hands from the wall to grab his hands to pry them off me. Quicker than I could react though, he had both of my arms twisted behind my back, held securely in a one-handed firm grip. My cheek and body were pressed hard against the wall in front of me while his big, muscular body was leaning on my tiny form. 
“Bad girl”, he hissed in my ear. “I did not give you permission to move, much less to touch me. Resistance is futile. The sooner you get that into your system, the better for you.” As he spoke, he swatted my butt a few times, to punctuate his words. I tried to squirm, but it was impossible, I was held too tightly.

He took my hands and again placed them on the wall in front of me. Then he laid his hands on my waist and pulled my lower body out further from the wall, so that I became unbalanced and had to lean on my hands not to fall over. Afterwards he made me spread my feet wide so that my body was positioned in the classic strip-and-search pose, and finally ordered me to stay put, or else…

I was panting slightly from fright and didn’t dare to do anything other than obey. He waited a minute or so, to let me calm down a bit, then let his hands again slowly slide up to cup my breasts. He started playing with them, squeezing, caressing, and lightly flicking the nipples, alternating the sensations from soft to hard and with occasional small bursts of pain. After a little while, he took my nipples between his fingertips and slowly, slowly tweaked them until I gasped from the pain. He kept still there for a moment, just to make a point of me having to let him do whatever pleased him, before letting go and returning to his toying of my breasts with one hand. The other one he let slide down my body, over my stomach, all the way to my cunt. With his other hand, he kept one of my nipples in a warning grip, silently telling me to behave, while he let his hand slide in between my legs.

Next, he let his finger, slick with foamy soap and my natural moisture, thoroughly examine every crevice of my pussy. I closed my eyes, trying, to no avail, to distance myself from my body’s reactions. But he made it impossible for me to ignore his hands, as they skilfully mixed pleasure with pain. Pretty soon, he had my stiff body trembling, my breaths now pants from arousal, more than fear. As he let first one, then two long fingers slip deep inside me, I involuntarily gasped from the intensity of the sensation, arching my back as much as I could, grinding myself on his hand. Just as I was about to abandon my stubborn and useless struggle not to come, my legs weak and shaking from lust, he stopped. 

He….. stopped! I couldn’t believe it. There he had me, against my will, so hot I could barely stand, and when I finally was about to let go, to let him win, he just stopped. I blinked, disbelievingly, trying to comprehend what was happening as he pulled his fingers out of me, released my bosom, and quickly but efficiently rinsed the soap off. 

If I was mad before, I was in a pure fury now. I never let my lust steer my actions. I was always in control, always level-headed about what happened in the bedroom. And now, when I, for once, let my control slip, I was denied the reward. I could not believe it! I glared at him as he finished rinsing me and turned the water off.

When he’d put the shower head back into its proper place, he met my eyes, taking in my stiff-legged, furious stance in a quick glance. I defiantly stared back at him, took a deep breath; but before I managed to say anything, his hand snaked out and grabbed the ring in my collar. With a quick pull and twist he had me lying on my stomach the floor at his feet, blinking, wondering what the heck had just happened.
He went into a crouch next to me, took one of my arms and twisted it behind my back in a painful grip. The other he used to take a firm grip of my chin and bend my head up so that I had to look him in the face.

“You have no more say in anything. Anything we want to do with or to you, you will accept, without complaint. You will do as you are told, promptly, and to the best of your ability. I do not want to hear any arguments from you. Failure means punishment. Is that understood?” When I didn’t reply he twisted my arm higher until I cried out a “Yes!” “Yes, Sir is the correct answer. Try again.”

I quickly answered with a “Yes Sir” and was rewarded with getting my arm back in a more comfortable position. He, then, lifted me up to a standing position and dried me off with a soft towel. Finished with that, he grabbed the leash and slapped his left leg, saying “Heel”. I quickly obeyed, going down to kneel next to his left foot, being too tired and confused to offer any more resistance. He clipped the leash back on and led me back to the cage. Before closing and locking the door he put a bowl of water on the floor for me to drink from. He made sure I drank some before he left me alone in the room again, forcing me to stand on my fours and only using my mouth while drinking.

My first time

I got my first kiss at the age of 15.

I made out my first time at the age of 15.

I had sex for the first time at the age of 15.

When I was 15 there were only a few girls in my class who were popular among the boys, us others kept to ourselfs. I found my first boyfriend online and it was he who gave me my first of everything. The first night we met he kissed me, I gave my first blow job, we had sex (without condom sigh...), we even tried anal. Except for the time when he pretended to come (still without a condom...) I recall it as a rather nice first time. I do not, however, remember if it hurt. At least there were no blood. I wish I would have thought more often about my first time so the memory would have been clearer but I have done everything in my power to forget what he done to me and apparently I succeded all to well. 

Back to the loosing of my virginity. Naturally I had been exploring myself for a couple of years already but that night increased my knowledge of sex by a 100%. And naturally when bragging about it to my friends it increased my status among them. At least in the section jealousy I like to think. Now when I'm older and wiser... I still bragg about it! I mean, a blog just for my own sex life, jeez... 
Ahem. Honestly it's more the exhibitionistic side in me that made me create it. If someone likes what I write and get turned on by it, I feel I have succeded. Ok, getting side tracked once again.

Do I regrett having sex on the first night? No.
Do I regrett having it with him? No.
Do I regrett meeting him? Yes.
Now this may strike you as not compatible but as life goes on, I've learned that every little experience makes you who you are at the moment and right now I'm rather happy how I turned out to be. And you can always change who you are, it just takes a really long time. If I haden't met him I don't know when my first contact with sex with another person would have been, my qualified guess is when I hooked up with my second boyfriend, also known as my current play pal. However bad person the first boyfriend was he did teach me some things: Don't trust unconditionally. Don't let anyone physically threathen me. And leave immediately if someones say "I'll kill myself if you leave me." Despite that he was never a bad lover, we had fun in bed and I never felt forced into doing something I wasen't prepared to do. Many times I have wondered if I got talked into doing stuff that first night, seeing as I don't really have a vivid memory of it, but in the end I think it doesn't matter. When I think back about it I don't have any regretts or strange feelings about it and I'm not emotionally hurt so whatever we did, it was good. 

Velcro

Boyfriend just got home with thin, long, doublesided velcro (kardborreband for you swedish without a dictionary close by)!

Amazingly enough he tried to tie my hands together, but just as an experiment not a sexual invitation. Boo-ooring. On the plus side he put the sticky side, the hooks, on the inside and told me to try and pull my hands apart. I failed of course, velcro is really good at keeping stuff together, but I got some nice tiny dots around my wrists wich I happily inspected.

And yes I got a bit turned on. And yes I really need to try this velcro buisness out.